The BIG test

In two days, we will fly to St. Petersburg, Florida and set sail for 8 days.  We won't be alone. A Captain will, apparently, make sure we don't die...or crash the boat.  The four of us, plus one Captain, for 8 days on a 40 foot catamaran should at least let us know if we can handle the tight space.  This isn't just a boat like the boat we'll be on. This is THE boat we'll be on:

I think there are several ways this will be a "good" test and a few, important ways that it won't. We'll definitely figure out if we like this idea.  Do we like it enough to try it for real?  I think that's a question we can answer.  And we'll definitely figure out whether the space is adequate.  This is about the size we can afford. Finding out how the sleeping arrangements work out ahead of time is a serious luxury.  And can we cook and to what extent will be decided.    Even with all of the reading I've done on provisioning, I still feel clueless about it.  I know that this experience will give me a handle on what we can reasonably carry and how long it will last. And seasickness - how bad will it be?  Will I be able to acclimate or will I be wretchedly ill any time the tide kicks up a bit?  These are my questions I think we can answer. 

The biggest question this can't answer, though, is how it will really be.  This isn't our boat.  So there will certainly be big differences there. There will also be an additional person on board.  As unobtrusive as he can undoubtedly be, we will still be "on" to some degree.  Having that fifth person on board ensures, perhaps, that we won't be able to fully relax. Then again, maybe it's like reality television. You get used to the cameras being around 24/7 and eventually you just learn to ignore them. 

Stay tuned....

The Big Test!

With the celestial navigation class under his belt, Henry is officially better versed in sailing than myself.  This wasn't hard to do, quite frankly.  He had likely surpassed me before we even started. After all, I still can't remember how to tie a bowline unless I do it two or three times. 

A side note: Gotta brag about the big brain I married. He scored a 98 percent on the celestial nav test, a test which apparently only about 50 percent of students pass.  WOW!

Anyway, the real test awaits.  On December 25th, (yep, we're traveling on Christmas Day) we fly to Florida for a week-long charter on a 41 foot FP.  Will we hate sailing by the end of the week?  Will we hate seafood?  Will we hate each other?  These are questions for which we must find answers before we can commit to this plan full force.

The four of us, plus Captain Frank, on a 41 foot boat for 7 days, 8 nights.  His plan, he says, is to take us out of the marina and not return there until January 2nd.   Just to give you an idea, this is the boat shown on the Charter School's web site:

Now, it's not all fun and games. We are getting a class after this as well, ASA 114 (otherwise known as Multihull Fundamentals).  We already have the book.  And here's what I've learned so far:

1) Nothing you've learned so far is of any use to you, because multihulls are different in every possible way than the boats you've already been on.

Yep, that's it. 

You know how you learned to tack on that 23 foot sloop?  Yeah, that's useless now.  Catamarans have no momentum.

Oh, and you know those hours upon hours of Man Overboard Drills? Yeah, kind of useless.  We do those different on a Cat. 

Okay okay.  To be fair, the cooking part will probably be similar, but I didn't really take a class for that.  And sure, the radio will be about the same too.  lol 

We're letting the kids bring their tablets.  I'm taking bets on how long after their batteries run down before the mutiny begins! 

Cooking on a boat?

Someday I know that I'll look back on this period of time and think, "That went so fast!"  But today, it feels the opposite.  Most of my dog business has been transferred to the new trainer.  The house is pretty clean.  "Pretty" because there's little point in a home with two kids attempting "spotless".   And the big stuff all has to wait.  So, here I sit. 

Fortunately, the distractions are helpful. I'm having lunch with my cousin today, and the weekend promises to be full of play dates and activities for the kids.  I've also been following more and more closely the Eat to Live program.  The recipes and cooking techniques are foreign to me, so I've been learning a lot about food for the last couple of weeks. I think of this as helpful for the cruising lifestyle as well.  A more plant-based diet is a more flexible diet.  When we run to a local market, I am hoping to have a better idea of what I'm seeing than I would had we continued to follow our meat and potatoes with the occasional pizza routine.  I'm becoming a squash connoisseur.  Butternut, acorn, spaghetti - I can make something out of all of these now.  My next conquest shall be sourdough bread.  With a culture, you can apparently keep making fresh sourdough day after day.   Hopefully, with the added bonus of fresh fish, we will not starve. 

And coffee! Let's not forget coffee. I will be giving up my Keurig, which is limping to its death anyway.  Instead, I'm opting for the more portable, and just as effective, French Press.  Since I'm the only one in our family who drinks coffee, it's perfect. I can still make just one cup at a time, and it's really easy to clean.  The cream that I seem to still require is going to be a little trickier.  I'm trying to wean myself off of it, slowly but surely. I'm down to a couple of spoonfuls/cup.  But that last dive into bitter is going to be tough for me. 

So, that's it! These are my distractions.  Limbo is not a pretty thing. 

The What If Game, and how not to play

What if the market crashes?
What if a job in radio comes along before we set sail?  An actual possibility.
What if the job in radio comes along 3 weeks after we set sail? 
What if we hate the week on the catamaran that we have planned in December?
What if we are seasick the whole time?
What if I have a mental breakdown before tomorrow?

The what if game is really not as fun as, say, volleyball.  I don't know why we all play.  There's a quote I really like by Lao Tzu that sums this up perfectly for me.

"If you are depressed you are living in the past. If you are anxious you are living in the future.
If you are at peace you are living in the present.”

Yeah, I know. Easier said than done.   About a week ago, my friend in the radio business was let go from his current job.  He's now actively looking for another job.  If he were to get a morning slot, I might get a phone call asking me to join him.  Which I would.  But the What If possibilities surrounding this scenario are impossible to contemplate.  Which market?  Which slot?  When?   Why wouldn't this produce extreme anxiety?  It's not enough for me to worry about stepping out of the dog training business. It's not enough for me to worry about Henry leaving a lucrative career behind. It's not enough for me to worry about homeschooling, renting out our home or selling all of our stuff. No, no, let's add another brick to that overflowing wheelbarrow!  It came to a head for me yesterday, and I crumbled under the pressure.  

 

So today, I'm attempting to refocus.  Today, I'm going to take my kids to the dentist.  Today, I'm going to go out to lunch with my family. And today, I'm going to do some laundry.  That's about all I can handle. For today.  

Leveling up

An interesting phenomenon about learning about bigger boats is that the little ones get a lot easier.  We took our Hobie Cat out for possibly the last time this year.  And what a piece of cake that sweet thing is to handle now.  I wonder if that progression continues so that if you learn all the way up to a 70 foot yacht that then tooling around in a 40 foot cat is a breeze.  Here's our 18 foot Hobie on Red Rock Lake in Minnesota. 

Meanwhile, things continue to get real.  We have found renters for our homestead.  Not my niece and her fiance as we initially thought.  Instead, the renters we have had in one of our town homes for the last couple of years are going to move in.  We estimate that move to be in August of next year.   Getting rid of, giving away, storing or selling our mountains of stuff is the next big hurdle to overcome. I'm going to start sending boxes home with my mother when she visits. There is some furniture that we'd definitely like to keep in the family as well, but we'll save that until the Spring.   A few friends have stepped up and offered to store things like art work or Christmas decorations.  But that really doesn't make a dent in a 2200 square foot home. 

We also have started the kids in semi-private swimming lessons. They're not completely incompetent in the water, but they're not as strong as I'd like. 

I think the biggest question on our minds now is how much boat we'll be able to reasonably afford.  Do we go for the biggest one we can?  Or the one with the most amenities?  I think some tough choices are in our near future.  "Tough" being a relative term.  lol 

A frustrating, yet necessary, weekend

Looks pretty, right?  Well, not so much in 30 mile per hour gusts and rain.  That's what we faced when we tried to charter a boat here this weekend.  First lesson in chartering a boat.  You have to go when you say you're going to go, regardless of what the weather is doing.  I do not believe that, had we been on our own boat, we would have gone out based on the forecast.  But we went, because we only had a (very expensive) 24 hour window. 

Leaving the slip was trickier than we had anticipated with a party pontoon directly behind us and a strong wind blowing us to starboard and into another boat.  We managed to back out, though we tagged the boat next to us with our bow. I am still kicking myself for not dropping a fender.  Nothing was damaged, but it was the principal of the thing.  

Sailing downwind was great. And I had my first experience cooking in a galley while underway.  I'm happy to report that was a success.  But then we realized that one key bag of our groceries for the weekend was sitting in our refrigerator at home.  Choices dwindling, we headed back into a headwind so strong that we could not make any progress with the reefed mainsail up.  Again, had this been our boat, we could have messed around with the jib.   Instead, to play it safe, we motorsailed back at a much slower speed than we had earlier in the day.  What started as a nice sail quickly turned into us bashing into wave after wave as the gusts hit 29 knots.  I struggle with seasickness, so to play it safe myself, I ducked down into the cabin where things were a lot bumpier but at least I could lie down and close my eyes (which always helps me).  Unfortunately, this left Henry and Reese alone in the cockpit where the adventure got trickier.  The reef line that someone before us had tied came loose, and Henry was forced to tie it down while underway while being pelted with the waves. 

When we finally got back in, I questioned the plan the boys had come up with. That went over like a bag of rocks, and I'm now kicking myself for that too. I was groggy and in no position to know what had been going on up above.  It turns out it didn't matter, because after three unsuccessful tries at our slip we ended up docking.  Second lesson in chartering a boat. People are so nice.  Several other sailors came out to help us tie up to the dock and were very reassuring about the wind and the difficult conditions.  One very experienced sailor told us he even had trouble. I doubt he was telling the truth, but I appreciated his kindness.

Overnight, we had a storm but all of us seemed to survive that without too much of an issue. Henry complained of seasickness because of sleeping on the boat, but I slept really well.  That we both experienced some seasickness though has us both questioning whether this lifestyle will work for us. I'm curious to hear about others' experiences with this. 

Confidence shaken, we mulled over whether we should attempt to take the boat to pump out and fuel up. Finally, we decided to go for it.  And we pulled it off without a hitch!  We even managed to put the boat back in the right slip when we returned!  Another sailor came over to tell us how brave we were for doing it.

Now, almost 8 hours off the boat, I still feel like I'm moving...or the ground under my feet is.  I wonder if one eventually acclimates to that or if I'll always feel a little unsteady after sailing. 

Next up - Florida in December.  This is the big test. It's a full week on a catamaran.  Yikes!

Another piece of the puzzle clicks into place

My niece and her fiance have agreed to live at our home!  The plan is tentative, but things look good. This is a giant puzzle piece, and it's a big relief to have it sliding into place.  Of course, it's also another thing making this whole idea a whole lot more real.  The practical questions of what to sell, what to keep and what they will want to keep have hit me full force.   My guess is that they'll want the riding lawnmower to stay!  It's 10 acres of property with about 2 acres of lawn and yard.  They might want our Jeep to double as snow blower.  Those are the obvious ones. But what about everything else?  Do they want the big TV?   Will they use this couch or that bed frame? What about the dining room set?  My brain might explode.  We will see them in a couple of weeks and I will attempt not to bombard them with these questions. 

My greatest challenge seems to be breaking the To Do lists down into manageable pieces.  I find that there is so much to do that I am frozen, overwhelmed.  There is so much to do that I do nothing at all.  I'm paralyzed.  I need to figure this out.  My hope is that when the kids start school in a couple of weeks, I will be more focused and able to answer these questions. 

Suddenly, leaving this place is bittersweet.  The hummingbirds will definitely miss us!  I'm a tiny bit jealous of my niece.

Another BIG hurdle overcome!

Certified in three sailing classes? Check! (Well, at least Henry is - I only have two under my belt, but I'm okay with that...mostly)

Sailing a 35 foot monohull?  Check!  This, up from the 23 foot sloop we started on.  Pretty proud of us.

Bringing the whole family sailing for an overnight?  Check!  And we didn't kill each other (bonus points)! Pictured below was our home for two days and two nights.  We took the live aboard option, so the first night was spent getting settled. Another bonus, Henry and I slept in the very tiny V-berth.  All 6'0" of my husband getting in and out of it absolutely made the trip for me.

Most of the first full day of sailing was drills. And more drills. Oh, and then we did more drills.  I lost count of how many times we did the Man Overboard drill, but after trying various ways of doing it I've decided that the quick-stop method is the toughest. I don't think there's anything quicker about it either, given our experiences.  Once again, I'll admit that I like sailing much more than I like sailing lessons. At some point, my brain is just FULL and I can't absorb anymore.  I found that aspect of being on the boat exhausting.

However, the rest of it was fantastic!  I actually loved the small space. We had plenty of room, and I realize that everything else from here on out is going to feel pretty luxurious.  The boat we plan to buy will be in the 40-43 foot range, and it'll be a catamaran.  Having been on a 43' foot catamaran on a charter, I'd have to say that it felt like two different worlds.

Our kids felt a little queasy at times, so we'll have to keep an eye on that.  But they did so well with everything that, at the end of the trip, our Captain said they were sweet kids!  And she was ever so impressed with their dedication in cleaning the boat for the next sailors.  We can thank my mom for instilling that value in me.  Thanks, Grandma Cherryl!

As far as galley cooking goes, that's going to be several more posts, I think.  But it really wasn't that different from cooking at home. Sure, everything is a little less spread out, but how much room do you really need?  Preparation is key.  If you have a stove top that is covered by a counter top, use that first to chop your veggies and get your ingredients ready.  I think having a few small, stackable bowls is going to be essential.

I was extremely relieved to discover that I do not get seasick from sleeping on the water!  The seasickness aspect of sailing has worried me, but I've only really gotten sick once. On the Pacific. After a storm.  It was rocking and rolling, and I wasn't the only victim.  I haven't had an issue since.  I briefly felt nauseated motoring in to the harbor, but I think that had more to do with the diesel fumes than with the water.  So maybe it's really true that everyone will get sick once in awhile...going to keep my Sea Band and Bonine in stock though, just in case.

Our next hurdle is taking out a 35' boat without a safety net (no Captain)!  That's only two weeks away.  I feel that we are, obviously, better prepared than we were before this trip, but I have a sneaking suspicion that there's a huge learning curve in here somewhere...stay tuned! 

What does it mean to be home?

I've always thought it's about where my family is, but my entire family won't be on the boat.  I'm thinking about my mom today. It's not just about her reluctance to sail. It's about her reluctance to travel at all, even to visit us.  My stepson's girlfriend is having a similar reaction.  I am powerless to change their minds and, really, I don't want to try.  What if I did convince them to visit and then they (and by extension, us) were miserable for the entire time?  While I'm wrestling with leaving family behind, we are also facing the problem of what to do with our homestead.  Our yard in the Spring, Summer and Fall is absolutely gorgeous.  Exhibit A:

 
It's Winter that we object to more and more, especially the older we get. So we sell, right? Ah, not so fast.  Our property is scheduled to be rezoned in 2022.  At that point, it may be worth considerably more as developers could chop it into smaller pieces.  So, what do we do?  Do we sell it now as a house with acreage?  Do we try to get developers to purchase it now and divide it into three or four lots (which it is zoned for), or do we try to rent it until 2022 when the zoning changes?  More than any other difficulty in sailing away, this is the one keeping my brain whirring at 11:58pm on a weeknight.  I don't know that there is a good answer, because each comes with its own set of pros and cons.  Who could we get to rent it?  Dog classes are also taught here on a full size agility field. What happens to that as my fellow trainers take over the business?  My hope is that things will be made clear as we get closer to our departure date.

Meanwhile, I am trying to redefine what "home" means to me.  No small task. 

Boat shoes for everyone!

As we attempt to save our money for this adventure, I'll admit that it's a little shocking how expensive some of the gear is that we need. We went to Scheel's Sporting Goods this weekend to get boat shoes for the family.  And I got the BEST tip from one of the sales people.  She had me try on the child's Keen shoe instead of heading over to the women's section.  As it turns out, a child's size 6 is roughly equivalent to a women's size 8.  This little trick saved me $50 on these (very high quality) shoes! 

Things I will not miss

I had the kind of crazy, run around type of day that is all too common in my world.  One child had a day camp at the zoo.  The other had a pre-audition workshop for dance.  An appraiser came to our home to assess our baby grand piano, since we're thinking that's not practical for our boat.  We will have to sell it.  And a mechanic came out as well.  That one was pretty horrifying, as he told me that the air conditioner itself is just fine. It's the mice chewing at the wiring that is the problem.  The little beasts have eaten through a bunch of wiring and that's why the air is out.  And it's 90 degrees and humid.  Try teaching a dog class in that.  Now we need an electrician. And oh! Is that the time?  I had three private dog training appointments, peppered in locations all over the south metro.  More drive time than appointment time.  I started at 6:30am and got home around 8:30pm.  This, I will not miss.

If nothing else, this will be here to remind me of this sort of day when something goes wrong on the boat.  I can look back at this blog and think to myself, "At least, I'm no longer doing that!"

I saw my children for a total of approximately 17 minutes today.  There was so much rushing around that when we are all (briefly) home at the same time, all I wanted was to sit in a quiet room by myself.   I wonder how many people feel like they're rushing through their lives to "get to the end" of the work?   Because that's how I felt today.

Then my sweet husband informed me that he will take our daughter to camp tomorrow morning. I could have wept.  I want to hang out with that guy more often!  Then to put the cherry on top, he told me that there was a "favorite sailing spot" thread on the sailing forum at cruisersforum.com.  This is what I want to hold in my head for tonight's dreams:

Habla Espanol?

Nope!  At least, not yet.  Thank goodness for duolingo.com and the many translator apps I've found.  I am hoping that it will be enough to get by...my actual, secret hope is that the attempt at Spanish in a foreign country will purchase at least a little bit of goodwill and that most people speak some English.  I think that immersion once we get there will help, but until then I'll be at the mercy of the local population. 

Meanwhile, the questions keep piling up. What kind of boat will we be able to afford? And most recently, WHERE should we buy it?  There seems to be a huge variation in price if you buy a boat in Europe.  I would love to hear of others' experiences with this, so we're doing some research.  Okay, we're doing a LOT of research.

My biggest question this week has been - how do you get everything onto the boat?  I'm presuming that we can haul the clothes we need to the marina, as well as some other necessities like linens and such.  But what about cookware, dinnerware?  We live in Minnesota. The last time I checked, there wasn't an ocean nearby.  Are we supposed to load up our car and drive to a coast with all of our stuff?  My husband says that if it doesn't fit in a car, it won't fit on a boat. But really?  There are 5 of us, and we have a Ford Fusion. 'Nuff said.   I think there must be some way to get the stuff on the boat that we need.  Can we bring a tv?  What about the Wii?  lol

Color me baffled. 

Sailing School vs. Sailing

We now have two ASA sailing courses under our newbie belts! We were able to combine 101 and 103 in four days on Lake Minnetonka.

There is so much to learn that I feel as though I learned nothing at all.  One thing is clear. I love sailing, but I'm not such a huge fan of sailing school.  Both Henry and I passed with flying colors, but there's a lot to memorize.  And I feel certain that we need to practice more often to keep all of this fresh.  I can see where it would simply fade away if we don't use it regularly.  

Another clear lesson: There is something in sailing for just about any personality type. I really enjoy gentle sailing on calm waters. There's nothing like it.  I greatly appreciate the beauty of nature and the pristine beauty of open water. 

Meanwhile, a first for our captain.  We did a buoy drill that I absolutely hated!  Crazy figure eights on a 23 foot sloop is not my idea of fun. The wind was pretty strong and the boat heeled a little too much for my taste. Our captain said she had NEVER seen a reaction like mine.  She said everyone loves it, because it's so fast and fun.  I completely hated it.

I don't think that racing is in my future. 

Making it real

Why is it that a concept becomes more of a reality when you tell another person about it?  Up to this point, the fact of our leaving our lives-as-we-know-them behind has seemed far away, a pretty little daydream. But I've told a couple of people about it, and suddenly it IS happening!

Baby steps help.  I have started using duolingo.com for Spanish practice, at least once a day for 20 minutes.  We will start having Spanish immersion meals soon.  And Ham Radio for Dummies is a pretty good read!  There's a fair amount of information, though I don't know how up to date it is.  The nicest thing about it is that it gives you terrific suggestions for web sites to visit.

Since I'm still running my dog training business, that's what today has been mostly about.  I'm trying to ease my way out of it but keeping enough of it to myself so as to be able to live until we buy a boat.   The two (and hopefully eventually four) trainers I've brought on board are amazing women.  Without them, the hard work that went into creating the business would just fade away to nothing.  It's very reassuring to have them in place.

The friends I've told have been overwhelmingly supportive.  But I have to say, the funniest question I consistently get is, "Are you bringing the kids?"  Our kids are 9 and 10.  I mean, what else would we do with them?  "Yeah, they're not coming along.  We figure they are old enough to fend for themselves. They'll be alright."   Were we supposed to leave them with their grandma?  For 3 years?  I think not!  lol   It really points out what a foreign concept this is to most people.  They ask as though we haven't considered their future.

"Oh, the kids! Shoot, we kind of forgot about them in all the excitement!  I have NO idea what we're going to do with them." 

To Do, to do, to do

If we all did the things we are capable of, we would astound ourselves. -  Thomas Edison

I like lists, to a point.  They keep me organized. But sometimes there are so many things on it that it becomes overwhelming.  A year is not a long time, and I realize that once school starts again, that my life will once again be consumed by the "have to's" that make up much of a parent's life.  I have to get the kids up. I have to get them to school. I have to call that client back.  You know that drill.  Most all of us do.  

So I'm trying to get as many things off of my To Do list as possible.  I'm very task oriented, which means I love to check things OFF the list.  Unfortunately, I find that impossible lately.  How do you check off "Learn Spanish" and "learn about Ham Radio".  Well, you don't, as it turns out.   Clearly, I need to break these things down into smaller pieces. The alternative is to remain paralyzed by how much there is to do.  I'm finding myself locked in helplessness.  I can't do it all, so I do nothing. 

A tip I read recently said that you should set a timer for 20 minutes. Do a task until the timer goes off and then switch to something else, whether you're done or not. I'm going to try that.  

Oh, and I probably have to get rid of my World of Warcraft account.  

Hopping off the treadmill

How much does it cost to live here?  Yes, there is a monetary cost.  The mortgages, the cars and the gas to drive them. And let's not forget utilities; heat, air conditioning, water, electricity.  Then there is the food.  Even if you eat at home and never, ever go to a restaurant, eating organic and healthy is not cheap.   The kids' activities are a pretty penny too.  Dance, soccer and school.  Between their hot lunch program, books, uniforms and school supplies, I need another part time job.

Do you really know how much it costs to live where you are?

And we really shouldn't stop there. There is another cost, the cost of being absent.  We run our children to one thing and then the next. I go to work as my husband gets home.  A woman I talked to today said that her husband has two jobs and works seven days a week.  That's a cost to a family.  When you are home, are you really present?  Are you absorbing every moment?

Are the goals you and your family set for yourselves the ones that you truly want?  Or are they the ones you've been told are necessary to succeed?

Well, we figured it out.  We actually do know what the monetary cost is to live here.  By tracking our spending on a simple web site (we used Mint.com), we watched our money come in and go out.   Over a 30 month sample, we have a pretty accurate idea of what it costs to live here.  And it was stunning.  Shocking, even.  Who knew that car maintenance could add up this way or that heating an older home could be so formidably expensive?

What we hadn't quite figured out was the cost to our family.  We knew something was wrong. We knew we weren't happy on the treadmill, and we knew that we didn't spend enough time together.

So we have decided to make a drastic, some might even say crazy, change.  We are not the first ones to do this and don't even feel very creative.  But the decision has been made.  We'll sell off our possessions, quit our jobs and sail into the sunset.  Sorta.  A lot has to happen between now and the Fall of 2016.  But our timeline is set and we are ready to take the steps necessary to live differently.

It is costing too much.