Thanks a lot, Stock Market

Well, that's not the only problem right now, but it's certainly not helping.  The fluctuation is crazy at the moment, and it's seriously messing with my mojo.  The amount of boat we can afford is going to be directly related to what our investments can do for us in the short-term.  We are also trying to weigh the tax implications of retirement, soon-to-be three rental properties (two townhomes and the homestead) and the sale of all of our STUFF.  The delicate balance required to fitting all of these moving pieces together has made me question whether we should do this now.

The answer seems to always come back to YES, we should. But how?  Well, and not just how - but how best?  I think up to this point I have had unwavering faith in my husband's ability with mathematics and economics.  But with so many changing tax laws, health insurance options and the housing market, I think maybe an expert or seven might be in the near future.  Should we take out a boat loan? Should we refinance before we leave?  Should I learn how to play the ukelele?

We've also started to question the once-solid idea of buying a catamaran in favor of a much less expensive option (read: monohull).   The advice we're given consistently is "whichever boat gets you out on the water sooner is the right boat for you".    So I think we're about to make some big shifts in our thinking given the current economic climate.  We may also push back our date for the "big leave" to later in the Fall.  Maybe October or even after the new year, to avoid the crushing tax burdens involved in doing this all at once. Our current plan is August 1, but I have become ever the realist. We shall have to see how it all plays out. We need a tax genie...or a lottery win.  Either of those would answer a lot of questions and make this whole thing a lot easier.

Then again...maybe it shouldn't be super simple.  If it was, we would not have to question our decision to do this.  And we wouldn't have to recommit to it every time a new wrinkle appears.  Perhaps I just need to embrace the uncertainties and allow the questions to just be.

(snort) Or maybe I need to get back to the gym and control what I can. 

The tipping point

I have reached a strange phase in this process.  On the one hand, I am in limbo. I have all the time in the world, and time is passing too slowly.  I want to just go already!  And then, on the other hand, there is no way we have enough time to do everything we need to before leaving.  The stuff we have to sell alone is going to take months!  You truly do not realize how much stuff you have until you put your hands on every single thing you own in a systematic way.  I mean, seriously, why do I have so many Christmas ornaments?  Where did they all come from?  And how do I get rid of them?  Do we keep the Christmas stockings or throw them in the "don't need it on a boat" pile?  I've been reading decluttering articles and doing searches on eBay so that I know how much to expect for various items.  That's another completely disheartening process. That adorable pair of brand name shoes that retailed for 80 bucks that you've worn once?  Yeah, those are worth four American dollars now. 

Then there's the issue of the husband still working a full-time job. I am not at all comfortable going through our stuff by myself. He's a lot more conservative.  I'd have simply thrown that tablecloth away, but he's convinced we can get a few bucks for it.  So, really, I am very limited in what I can do until he can help me. 

Meanwhile, my dog training business is all but gone (a very strange feeling).  When I used to have breaks between classes, I knew another one was coming up.   Now, I have exactly one more class to (co) teach, and then I'm completely and "forever" done with it.  It's a daunting concept, but so much of this is.  Not having my own income, paltry as it was, is a hard pill to swallow.  I've become a complete miser.  How big a tip should I leave?  Let's eat at home instead of going out.  Oh, look! That soda is on sale! And I have a coupon for that!   I'm ready to sell my car, just to ease the guilt of not working. 

On another front, I had a conversation about homeschooling today with a professional in the education field and now feel completely inadequate in meeting my childrens' educational needs.   I waffle on this almost daily.  One moment, I'm fully prepared. How hard can it be, after all? I will only have two students, not 24! Teachers do this every day!  But in the very next moment, I am panicking because I do not remember one single thing about Trigonometry or diagramming a sentence. 

So here's what I think.  There is a tipping point at which the momentum shifts. At that point, everything we do will be geared toward sailing away.  Until that happens, I will simply feel frozen.  So much time. Not enough time.  I look forward to falling off of the edge. 

The Test is Complete

We spent a week on a 40 foot boat and did NOT kill each other or our delightful Captain. Success, right?  Perhaps.  I think that Henry and I are cautious people, him more so than me.  And so, even though we think we're ready to make this leap, there are many questions still to be answered. The questions we absolutely did answer on this trip:

1) The space was quite adequate. There was no time when I felt cramped or stir crazy.  There are plenty of places on a 40 foot boat to "get away".  There are at least 6 or 7 different spaces to occupy, so feeling crowded was never a problem. This was a big surprise to everyone, I think. And cooking on the boat was a snap. It really wasn't much different than cooking at home. Turning the propane on and off was the extra step. 

2) Sea toilets are not land toilets.  Sea toilets are just not good.  This is one of those things that, in our opinion, deserve an upgrade to THE BEST technology you can afford.  'Nuff said.

3) Mattresses require upgrades.  Now, the boat we were on is a charter, so of course there is some wear and tear.  I swear, the mattresses were worse than the ones we camp with (in a tent).  Basically, we slept on boards for a week.  And what's with the sheets, people?  Custom made fitted sheets (or the homemade alternative) are key.  Drawstrings or bungees will work for this. 

4) Air conditioning is a nice perk on a boat.  It's not necessary, really, but for dehumidifying damp clothing or towels, it's really helpful.  It's not a priority for us, but maybe we can upgrade this at some point down the road on any boat we'd buy.

5) Catamarans are not the best sailors, but they are incredibly easy to maneuver.  A lot of the fear I had about docking was taken away this week. Twin engines, for the win.  I was very impressed by how tight those turns can be.

There's more, of course, but the gist of it was - YES! I want to do this.  Do we want to do it forever?  I don't know. But I think an adventure like this is a must.  We've shown ourselves that we can do it, physically and mentally.  Now it's a matter of actually taking that leap. That's no small thing. 

But when you can spend New Year's Eve here instead of in 20 degree weather, how could you resist?  A lot of the discussion this week was about the kids.  We sailed (or motored) every day we were out this week. We would absolutely not do that if this was our life.  We would spend more of our time in anchorages and exploring (and homeschooling) and less time actually on the water.  Overall, it was excellent experience and made me want more of it.  I'm ready to go!